Single and Searching for Him

Numbers have never been my favorite thing.  As a child, math was always difficult for me.  Give me a book or tell me about history, I was there.  Numbers, not at all. My life revolves around numbers.  I study them at work.  I analyze them, I graph them, I keep multiple Excel spreadsheets. My morning today started with numbers.  5:00 AM.  That in and of it self is a horrible number sometimes...  Anyway, back to my morning.  I get up, drive myself to the gym for my weekly torture, I mean training, session.  My trainer meets me there and has me get on the scale.  It was measurement day.  I got on the scale.  He did my measurements (twice), took my blood pressure, calculated my BMI (Body Mass Index) (twice).  We took a look at the numbers.  They were horrible.  Things that were supposed to go down went up or stayed the same, things that were supposed to go up, went down.  I was devastated.  So now,...

This past year has been full of changes for me, yet, there are times when I feel as if nothing has changed.  I look in the mirror and still see the same person I was a year ago when I started this journey.  I still see the person who wanted to change, but had no idea or desire to truly do the work to change.  I still see the girl who couldn't do anything or wanted to do anything.  I still see the old me. My brother just spent two weeks with me.  He has an amazing ability with a camera.  He wanted to see some spots in North Carolina that he would not get in Ohio.  So we got in the car and headed west.  We landed in Pisgah National Forest at Looking Glass Falls.  He got some beautiful shots (one which is now on my wall).  From there, we went to Linville Falls and hiked up to the upper falls and he got some good shots as well.  Then, we saw people down at the base of the falls.  So we decided to traverse down there.  The...

Before anyone gets upset or thinks I have lost my mind, there is a story behind the title.  I do know that the choral response is "He is Risen indeed".  However, one year at Easter someone came up to me on Easter Sunday and said "He is Risen".  I stared at him and brilliantly said "Yep!"  Of course a couple of my good friends were right there, so now every Easter, I am reminded of that brilliant moment in my life. On a more serious note, today is probably my favorite holiday.  Not because of the Easter baskets or egg hunts.  Not because of the dinner that my family traditionally has together.  Not because of the new dress.  Because this day represents hope.  Without this day, there is no hope in my life.  Without this day, there is no joy.  This day is the most important day in my faith because without the resurrection of Christ, I would be worshiping another dead guy.  But, my God isn't dead.  Not anymore.  Not sin...

So today is an anniversary of sorts for me.  Eleven months ago, I started on this journey that I will be on for the rest of my life.  Looking back on what I have accomplished and how far I have come is pretty awing.  It hasn't been easy, in fact, it is probably one of the hardest things I have done.  Changing how I eat, going to the gym, changing everything about my life.  However, in the last 11 months, I have lost 65 pounds, got my blood pressure from 190/80 to 118/65, run a 5k without stopping, started working out with a trainer and forced my body to do things I never thought it would be possible for me to do, taken my 5k time from an hour to 40 minutes. While I have done all of these great things, there are days when I have not done life well.  When those days of doubt come, I have a great network to go to that reminds me just how far I have come.  I know that the people that I do life with and have been with me on this journey will help get my f...

The goal of the call of God is his satisfaction, not simply that we should do something for him. We are not sent to do battle for God, but to be used by God in his battles. ~Oswald Chambers I have been doing a devotionalt from the book My Utmost for His Highest by Oswald Chambers. This week, I read this and it has been resonating with me all week. We aren't to fight God's battles, but to be used in the fight. That is the call of God. To be used. Period. Looking up the word battle in a concordance is like going through a lot of Old Testament wars. Each one had a purpose and was, in the end, for the glory of God. Psalm 24:8 says "who is the King of glory? The Lord strong and mighty in battle." We each have our battles that we are in. Trials, hardships, sickness. Some of our own making. I was able to spend time this weekend with former coworkers. Lots of changes occurred in all our lives since we last saw each other. It was amazing to see how the battles that were ...

Thanksgiving is over, fall is ending and it's time for my favorite time of year.   My black Friday has consisted of Hallmark Christmas movies and decorating my house for Christmas. As I was unwrapping the ornaments and decorations,  I couldn't help but take a trip down memory lane.   Each ornament on my tree has a special memory attached to it.  From the person who gave it to me, to the place it was bought, to what it commemorates, each one is special to me. Unwrapping them is remembering a piece of my life.  I had them all laid out on the couch and started crying over some of them.   Yes, I am a big sap.  But, I can't help it.  This is the way I was made! As we start this Christmas season,  it is so easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of the commercialism and stuff of Christmas,  that is not what I like about this time of year.  For me, Christmas is about the hope of something,  the joy of new birth, and the pea...

It's 3:30 AM and I can't sleep.  My dog is snoring beside me, but I am wide awake.  I woke up suddenly and couldn't get back to sleep.  It's like my brain decided to go into overdrive the moment my body was awake.  One of my favorite people found out some news yesterday and my heart hurts for her.  Another had a tough situation to deal with this week. Another is preparing for a rough road ahead.  I have a major headache to deal with.  This week we were chatting and our conversation went from the insane to completely open and honest with each other.   I had to stop and praise God that He gave each of us this safe place to truly share one another's burdens without fear of gossip, or judgement, or condemnation.  But to share all of us with each other. Maybe that's why I can't sleep.  I need to cover them with more prayers.  I am grateful that I can boldly go to the throne and take these burdens to Him.  In 1st Peter, He says cas...