Good Friday in Isolation...

Today is Good Friday.  A day of huge significance in the Christian church.  Today is the day that my Savior became my Sacrifice.  It’s a somber day.  A day of reflection and remembrance of what was done for our sins and guilt.  However, with the world shut down, it looks and feels a little different than it ever has in my lifetime.

This week has been rough mentally.  Physically, I have been walking on my treadmill every day (until I realized it’s been 7 days since I have left my house and my brother politely suggested I walk around our neighborhood...), but mentally, emotionally, spiritually... those have been a struggle.  I have been trying to find something every day to be thankful for, but it seems as if it’s the same 5 things I am thankful for.  As the week is going on, I haven’t even put in my journal what I have been thankful for because it feels as if it is turning into a fake thing.  Am I really thankful?

So I have really felt alone and drifting this week.  I have felt REALLY single and empty.

The bright spot of this week was a surprise visit from one of my favorite people with a package of  Peeps.  My music ministry went to every single person in my church choir and hand delivered a note and Peeps.  It was great to see Durell in person, through a door and behind a mask.  It’s one of those moments I wish I would have taken a picture of!!  When I went back to my room to get back to work, the tears started coming down making me miss my choir family all the more.

So, what I am realizing is that in this weird world we are living in, it’s ok to be sad.  It’s ok to be disappointed.  I had a big thing planned the beginning of May and it’s not happening now which is heartbreaking.  It’s ok to be lonely and miss hugs from your friends and family.  It’s ok to take a break from television, social media, work to relax in a hammock in the backyard with a book.  It’s ok.

Mental health looks different for everyone.  Everyone handles things a little differently and that’s ok. It doesn’t mean that I am less of a person for having these doubts, but what I can do is when these doubts start creeping in, is pray.  I can also reach out to my therapist and my friends who I know will pray for me and will talk me off of the ledge.

In this era of social distancing, isolation is not ok.  Technology is vital right now for our mental health.  Get a zoom meeting with your friends and family.  Reach out to people you trust to help pull you back.  It’s a weird world we are living in and we need to make sure that we are checking in on each other.

While this Easter weekend isn’t going to look the same, the good news is that it still means the same. What greater weekend to show the love of Christ than the one we remember when the greatest man in history gave everything in order to allow us a way to have a relationship with Him.  Because, sometimes, the smallest gesture from people who care about you, mean more than they will ever know.






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