Reflections on another year
As I sit here, in the glow of my Christmas tree, my candles burning, Christmas music playing softly in the background, I am at peace. I love the lights, smells, and sounds of Christmas and enjoy sitting in my living room with the tree lit and the music playing. It instantly calms me down and sets my focus on what Christmas is all about. This also leaves a lot of time to think!
This past year, 37, has been full of great moments as well as moments of absolute despair. Choices that I have made, circumstances out of my control, and life in general have all merged together to weave this year. Where I was at 37 is no where near where I thought I would be when I planned my life out in middle school. In English class, either my seventh or eighth grade year, we had to write our own obituary stating all of the things that we have accomplished in our lives. I took that assignment and made it my timeline. I was going to go to college, graduate, get married, have four children (2 boys, 2 girls... preferably two sets of twins ;) ), have a great job teaching, retire to a beach house on the eastern coast and live happily ever after! Well... on this list, I did attend college, but didn't graduate until I was almost 26 since I took a year off and switched schools, which is well past the time I thought I would. I did teach for 7 years, but not in the school I thought I would (Never saw myself living 500 miles from my family!) At 37, I never thought that I would be single, living by myself, in North Carolina working in the insurance industry and liking it! But then again, I'm not God and this is where he saw me!
37 brought many changes to my life. Some good, some bad, some consequences of prior choices that I have to live with. I got to see my brother accomplish a hard worked for goal (one of my favorite moments of this year was watching him cross the finish line and hearing "You Are an Ironman!") Still makes me teary eyed!! I got a new boss after a year and 1/2 of not having a boss. I was given a promotion at work to represent the work that I do. I was able to spend my mom's birthday with her. I spent a lot of time with family, friends who are family, and friends that are dear to me. I've learned that my God is a great big God that truly cares for the little things in my life. I've realized that life isn't perfect and I'm ok with that. I have learned that I'm not in control, nor should I try to be. I have worked on my physical well being (though still have a long way to go on that front) I have accomplished a lot at 37 that as I look back over this past year, I can truly say it was a good year.
As I start 38 today, I have been asked where do I see this year going? The truth? I truly don't have a clue, but am so excited for the ride. So, today, as I sit here, desperately wishing to be close to my family, listening in the still of the night, and soaking in all the calm, yes, I am teary eyed that I am alone, but thinking about this coming year and all of it's possibilities, I am looking forward to what lies ahead for me this year.
So thank you for the birthday wishes, texts, calls today. It has reinforced how blessed I am to know so many caring, wonderful, thoughtful people. 38 is going to be a great year!!
This past year, 37, has been full of great moments as well as moments of absolute despair. Choices that I have made, circumstances out of my control, and life in general have all merged together to weave this year. Where I was at 37 is no where near where I thought I would be when I planned my life out in middle school. In English class, either my seventh or eighth grade year, we had to write our own obituary stating all of the things that we have accomplished in our lives. I took that assignment and made it my timeline. I was going to go to college, graduate, get married, have four children (2 boys, 2 girls... preferably two sets of twins ;) ), have a great job teaching, retire to a beach house on the eastern coast and live happily ever after! Well... on this list, I did attend college, but didn't graduate until I was almost 26 since I took a year off and switched schools, which is well past the time I thought I would. I did teach for 7 years, but not in the school I thought I would (Never saw myself living 500 miles from my family!) At 37, I never thought that I would be single, living by myself, in North Carolina working in the insurance industry and liking it! But then again, I'm not God and this is where he saw me!
37 brought many changes to my life. Some good, some bad, some consequences of prior choices that I have to live with. I got to see my brother accomplish a hard worked for goal (one of my favorite moments of this year was watching him cross the finish line and hearing "You Are an Ironman!") Still makes me teary eyed!! I got a new boss after a year and 1/2 of not having a boss. I was given a promotion at work to represent the work that I do. I was able to spend my mom's birthday with her. I spent a lot of time with family, friends who are family, and friends that are dear to me. I've learned that my God is a great big God that truly cares for the little things in my life. I've realized that life isn't perfect and I'm ok with that. I have learned that I'm not in control, nor should I try to be. I have worked on my physical well being (though still have a long way to go on that front) I have accomplished a lot at 37 that as I look back over this past year, I can truly say it was a good year.
As I start 38 today, I have been asked where do I see this year going? The truth? I truly don't have a clue, but am so excited for the ride. So, today, as I sit here, desperately wishing to be close to my family, listening in the still of the night, and soaking in all the calm, yes, I am teary eyed that I am alone, but thinking about this coming year and all of it's possibilities, I am looking forward to what lies ahead for me this year.
So thank you for the birthday wishes, texts, calls today. It has reinforced how blessed I am to know so many caring, wonderful, thoughtful people. 38 is going to be a great year!!
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